While it's often easier, quicker, and even more skillfully performed when we do things for our children, it's not always best. After all, we're not always around to be at our children's service! Why not teach your children how to tie their own shoes as a lesson in self reliance? This article provides 5 tips to help parents teach their children how to tie their own shoes.
Teaching children how to tie their own shoes is one way to help them learn self reliance. When they learn self reliance through shoe-tying, they may be apt to try other things on their own and develop into more independent, capable, and competent children, teens and adults.
Since the invention of Velcro, most children’s shoes feature these easy closures. Still, there are benefits of teaching children how to tie their own shoes. On the physical side, it helps children work on their fine motor skills, hand-eye coordination, and dexterity. On the social side, it helps children employ self reliance and can lead to increased confidence in one’s own abilities. Besides, it’s still an important childhood milestone!
Here’s a few tips to help children learn how to tie their shoes all by themselves:
(1) Different colored laces: You will likely find that it’s easier to help your child learn how to tie his own shoes if the laces are not the same colors. Instead of saying “the right one” or “the one in that hand” you can say, “put the red one over the blue one.” Different colored laces can make any shoe-tying technique easier.
(2) Bunny ears:
a. Tell your child, “let’s make some bunny ears with your laces!”
b. Then, teach him how to make a tight knot that can become the top of the bunny’s head. Take one lace in each hand and make an X. Then pull one lace through the bottom of the X (like a train going through a tunnel) and pull tight.
c. Tell your child, “Now let’s give our bunny some ears.” Loop the laces to make 2 ears.
d. Tell your child, let’s make the ears nice and tight so they don’t fall off the bunny’s head!” With the 2 “ears” make an X shape, pass one “ear” under the X, again, just like a train going underneath a tunnel, and pull tight.
(3) Use a giant shoe cut-out: You can buy one or make one yourself. Cut out a big shoe-shape. Get your child involved by allowing him to decorate it with his favorite colored markers or stickers. Then string an extra long lace through the shoe cut-out (a shoe lace that’s 2 different colors on each side can be helpful here—sew a red and green lace together or dip each side of a white lace in dye for the same effect). Allow your child to work on the “giant’s shoe” using any teaching method you like.
(4) The scaredy cat and the tree: This method uses a fun story to help children tie their shoes. This method is also known as the squirrel going ‘round the tree. It can be helpful to tell your child stories because they can make it easier for him to remember the steps. Not only does this method help your child develop self reliance but it also exercises your child’s fine motor skills and dexterity since he needs to switch hands.
a. Tell the child, “make tree roots by making a knot.”
b. Then say, “make a long loop to make a very tall tree. Hold that loop in your right hand.” (A sticker on your child’s right hand can help him remember right from left).
c. Tell your child, “with the left hand, hold onto the other lace. This is the scaredy cat! The cat runs around the tree and jumps into the hole under the tree and out the other side.”
(5) Try some shoe-tying books or toys: There are wooden shoe-tying models and shoe-tying books that allow your children to practice! Books or games like “Tie Your Shoes Rocket Style” or “The Wooden Lacing Shoe (Melissa and Doug) are some good options.
Dr. Robyn’s PowerNote: If your child’s a lefty and you’re not, ask another lefty to help you teach your child how to tie his or her shoes. Or—mirror them! Sit across from your children and tie a shoe along with them. This way, your shoe tying will match what they’re doing.
Again, while Velcro and bungee cord laces are available, learning to tie ones own shoes helps with self reliance and development. And, as you know, your youngster will grow to be an adult one day...and when is the last time you used Velcro to fasten your shoes? You might as well teach them now as they will need to learn the skill eventually!
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